Autism and family relationship seems needed to discuss with among those people who can relate what was going on inside their family. Sometimes you really needed a shoulder to confide on with all the issues and problems that the whole family had encountered. Affecting every little thing even when you tried to divert your attention to other things but still it would bring you back and make you face the same real and actual issue in which you knew from the start that there is no other way of getting away from it.
You have a child with autism disorder he seems look fine the way he played games in the computer , eating food, watching TV or even doing simple things around inside the house like putting the trash away , get the vacuum and clean the room with your eyes on him. Those such things that he did seems natural and you might say there is nothing wrong with him and it could have been perfect if he would respond completely with utter words and not repeating the words that you just said.
When you talk to him, he would just look at you. You were trying to communicate with him hoping that he could talk back and say something that is newer to your ear. But he did not, what word you just said is the same word you will hear from him when he respond but indistinct. Even when it’s time to eat lunch or dinner normally having everyday routine when you call him to come to the dining table. If he is not really up to it, he will make some strange voice and acting crying perhaps as if he was trying to say that he wanted to play instead.
When you insisted things to him like what you want him to do he would even create more noise, kick the chair or sit on the floor and stamp the carpet with his foot many times. He was doing these to get your attention , the same as saying he doesn’t like what you asked him to do. And if you act against it like pretending your mad. I bet it will not work. You just release the tantrum disorder out of him and that begins your misery on that day.
Oh what a day, I know the feeling because I’ve been there that was exactly how I feel. Unseen hope, like a road that has no end, no exact place to hide neither to go to as if I was lost and confused. But the thing is, how would I handle the situation? Even if I screamed and blamed it to the man above it would not change the fact that I have a son that has autism. It hurt down inside and can’t hide it. How I wish we could foreseen the future or what he would become and maybe there is a chance to make things right.
So much for helplessness , I was not the one who is suffering from this disorder but my son. Why would I be more affected as if I had already loose life and gave up. I should not be weaken by the situation , my son hasn’t given up yet. He is fighting and I should have known that there were more battles inside of his mind, as if he wanted to get out from it but he can’t.
Just imagine what could have been inside his world. He can’t talk, he can’t express himself to say the things that he wants. Imagine how hard to be in his life, in his situation but here I am complaining . For him he kept fighting and continue breathing even if he don’t say it but I knew he doesn’t want me to loose hope either. Every time he smiled at me, I know he is there saying ” I will not give up Dad as long as you never give up on me”.
Keep hope alive in mind
Now I know that I should be strong, believing that I am the wall that my son is leaning on. I cant leave him this way . I must continue searching , bring him there to the end line of this suffering and get him live with a normal life. The question is how there are so many hindrance , so many obstacles . If only I had all the capability of doing everything then my chance of saving my son’s future would be unbounded. But I am gaining and not loosing hope , there would be a way somehow because every question has an answer. It’s just a matter of time when.
So, for those people out there who were loosing hope. Feeling so depressed and don’t know what to do. All I can say is, fight for your child and don’t give up for his sake. Remember that there is always light at the end of the every tunnel. May God bless us all.
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